Anchored at the core. Restricted by your family, one of your parents or your heritage. Unsupported by your parents. Having had heavy family responsibilities. Family life is a burden. Home life was cold and sterile. An impoverished childhood. Feeling separate or isolated from the rest of your relatives. Home alone. Feeling neglected. Lack of ease and comfort within. Cut off from personal feelings. Basic insecurity. Basic fear of lack and neglect.
One of your parents may have imposed standards and conditions you had to meet to receive affection. You might have only received praise or positive reinforcement when you did everything according to the rules. Affection is conditional. Acceptance from your family requires living up to their standards. Nurturing is conditional. Sometimes it’s easier to be alone. Having had judgmental parents. Strict parents. Demanding parents. Parents who overly structured your private time. Tiger Mom. A sense of inner lack. Your relationship with your parents forms the core of your identity. Your understanding of expectations, limitations, hard work and a plan of action determines how far you go in life. Knowing how to hold your own. Tough on the inside.
Working hard to establish your own inner sense of security and belonging. Putting in the effort to make family life work. Putting in the effort to get in touch with your roots. Taking family life seriously. Taking all the ins and outs of familial relationships, heritage, roots, home, and your tribe very seriously. Sensing that you are being judged because of where you come from or what your roots are. Taking your role as a a parent very seriously: “I’ll do x, y, z that my parents never did.” Having ambition that wells up from within. Having expectations for yourself that come from with. Having a hard time meeting your own expectations. Feeling inferior or inadequate. Feeling the need to prove to yourself that you are somebody worthy of affection. Deeply conservative inside. Holding your feelings in check. Feeling cut off from having a private life.
Feeling responsible for your family home or land. Feeling that you have a duty to your country or place of origin. Learning how to control your interactions with family members so you don’t get hurt. Learning how to control your inner feelings. Learning how to control your expectations so you’re not disappointed. Mastering feelings of inadequacy. Learning to give yourself enough love so you feel good enough. Learning how not to withhold affection. Keeping a realistic perspective on your parents. Keeping a realistic perspective on your private life. A realist. Someone who can handle reality checks. Someone who understands boundaries and limitations and knows how to work with them. Taking your emotional security seriously. Making the necessary arrangements to feel safe and protected. Preserving your family traditions, or severing them if they no longer serve you. Having a very well-defined sense of an inner purpose which propels you in your outer work. Emotional security comes with age.