The recognition of having a finite amount of time.Time-consciousness. Waiting for the right time. Good sense of timing. The ability to put yourself in the right place at the right time. Not enough spontaneity. If not now, when? The ability to be discerning. Gray days. Raindrops are falling on my head. A dour outlook. Duly dour. Taking life seriously. Little gray men. Contracting into manifestation. Rigid. Maturity. Authority. Restriction. Barrier. Hard lines. The difference between me and you. Boundaries and barriers. Barriers to personality. Barriers to relationship. People put you in a box. You put yourself in a box. Lack of personality. Sticking to the rules. Standards of behavior. Standards of appearance.
Keeping people at a distance. No merging. Learning how to present yourself professionally. Learning how to have healthy personal barriers. Presenting a mask of maturity. Aging fast. Looking older. Acting like a parent. Taking on others’ responsibility. The rules of engagement. Literally, the rules of engagement … you might have a lot of rules that you impose on your partner. You make your partner jump through hoops to be with you. You might make your partner feel that they have to prove themselves to you. You are someone to be looked up to and respected. You might find it difficult to respect people who don’t have personal goals. You measure your progress by how people respond to you. It might be hard to break through and prove yourself. You’re hard on yourself and you’re hard on others. Or, you take on all the difficulties of your partner while they loaf.
Restructuring your outlook. Getting real about your presence in the world. Taking a step back to assess the situation. Learning to check your surroundings. Security-consciousness. Rarely letting go. Afraid of getting in trouble. I am me and you are you. Understanding of personal barriers and personal space. Respectful of personal boundaries. Respectful of other people’s situations. Wanting respect in return. Wanting to be respected. Wanting to be taken seriously. Looking forward to getting older. Looking forward to growing up. Not wanting to be treated like a kid. An adult. A serious person. An old man. A crone. A hermit. A twig. A bone. Fears of looking like a fool. Bad dreams of being a clown. Bad dreams of showing up with no clothes on. Fears of failure. Every interaction is a lesson. Cashing reality checks. Accepting reality. Accepting who you are and where you are.
So many obstacles. So many struggles. Things can be grim. Toughening up. Getting real experience. Having a real life. Danger of becoming too hard. Danger of the outer personality becoming too strong a barrier against the inner life. Over-identification with crystallized outer identity. Hard knocks. Imposing a serious view. Learning to balance levity and seriousness. Making peace with life’s struggles. Understanding that hardship is part of life.
The ability to take your version seriously despite opposition. The ability to go the distance with your viewpoint. The ability to cut through superficiality. The ability to consider long-term implications of choosing a direction in life. The ability to plan ahead. The ability to take your time. The ability to wait for rewards. The ability to trudge forward without praise or hand-clapping. Tenacity. Grit. Hard-working. The ability to set a routine and stick to it. Steadily manifesting a life path. Methodical fulfillment of path goals.