feel it all. I feel it all. I feel like I want to go home. I want to go home. I need to go home. I’m scared to go home. I feel like I want to cry. Where is home? What makes a place feel like home? What makes your city feel like home? What makes your country feel like home? What makes you feel patriotic? What makes the Earth feel like home? What would you miss if it were gone? What tugs at your heart strings? What feels like family? What do you have in common with the people you care about? Looking for the common thread. Family crests. Coat of arms. Tartans. Navajo blankets. Embroidery. Friendship bracelets. Quilts. Weaving ourselves together. Memories of where you come from. Tapping into the sentimental past. What do you miss? Who do you miss? Who misses you? Digging into your ancestry. Finding out where you come from. Asking your mom. The Akashic Records. The Pluto in Cancer generation is fully dying out.
Home is where the heart is. Where is your heart? What are you putting your heart into? We need more caring in the world. We need to care more. Being concerned without being a fear-monger. Stop letting corporations tell you what you need. Feel what you need. What do you need, dear reader? Yearning for those near and dear to your heart. Yearning for familiarity, comfort, and safety. Who can you turn to? Where are your bonds? Overcoming distance, restraint and fear to reconnect to what makes your heart soar.
The antidote to the world’s woes is, I care. It’s hard to keep caring and expressing how you feel. It’s hard to be vulnerable after heartbreaks, letdowns, and failures. People don’t want to let themselves be vulnerable and actually care. Caring is to get ahead. Caring is so you seem like a nice person. The appearance of caring. Choose to give a damn.
Be the first one to break the ice. Be the first one to say you’re sorry. Be the first one to say, “I love you.” Risk rejection. No thing is a sure thing. Stay sensitive. Wear your heart on your sleeve. Be nice, genuinely nice – because you want to be nice, because you choose to be nice. The easy way out is to shut off your feelings. The easy way out is to toughen up to point of having no feelings. The easy way out is to shrug and say, “That’s just the way it is!” The easy way out is to act like it doesn’t affect you. The easy way out is to act like you don’t care.
You need things to live and be happy on this Earth. You need people to live and be happy on this Earth. Career success isn’t enough. Making it through to the end isn’t enough. Riding it out isn’t enough. Feeling used. Feeling like people only want to deal with people who benefit them in some way. Lack of real emotional interaction. Needing and yearning for real emotional interactions. Yearning for others to be receptive to your emotions. Wanting others to feel what you feel. How fast do the smiles fade after a joke? Who is all that smiling for? The camera, or you?
Whatever, I don’t really care anymore, it doesn’t matter. I give up. Deep disappointment that is difficult to get over emotionally. Having to dig really deep to find that well of emotion again. Having to dig really deep to want to risk rejection again. Even if you could do something, you feel, “What’s the point?”
Haha! You care! Lol! Gotcha! Loser. Winners don’t care. Winners do what they need to win. Did someone trick you into caring? Feeling ashamed for caring. Feeling like an idiot for giving a shit. Nice guys finish last.
Fear of being carried away by the undertow of emotion. Fear that if you let yourself feel all the muck, you won’t be able to pull yourself out again. Fear of emotion. Fear of a genuine “personal touch.” Longing for a genuine personal touch. Taking in too many harsh experiences. Needing soothing and reassurance. It’s going to be okay. You’re safe. I have your back. I’m looking out for you. I care about you. I won’t let anyone hurt you. You are welcome anytime. I understand how you feel. You’re not alone. You are irreplaceable.
Feelings aren’t professional. Feelings aren’t cool. All the feels? What feels? Feelings are annoying. Feelings interfere with success. Feelings will hold you back. Feelings make you vulnerable. Feelings are stupid. Nobody wants to see your ugly crying face. You’re going to make your makeup streak and that won’t look good on Instagram. Selfies, not feelies. Smile for the government 🙂 Aaaaaaw, “feeeelings“, isn’t that cute? Isn’t it cute when you feel something? Oh, look! He felt something, isn’t he cute?! Feeling cute. Feelings are for puppies and kittens. Condescending attitudes towards people with emotions. Stop being hysterical. Feelings are for idiots. Feelings are for unsophisticated people. Feelings are for babies. Babies need to grow up! What are you, like two already? Get a job! Cry baby. Toughen up. Be an adult. Wearing out your welcome. Back in my day, men were men, and we did it this way!
Too much sensitivity to everybody’s feelings. Stewing in sympathy soup. You feel bad for everyone. You feel bad for everything. Things feel bad. Excuse me, but I digest. A period of time spent digesting your experiences. Spending a period of time cleansing. Taking a bath, not taking a picture of a bath. Soaking up experience. Feeling aaaalll the feels. Sorry, I’m too busy to cuddle right now.
Self-protection is a need. Be careful who you let into your sweet world. Is your environment too small to contain you? Are your feelings so big, you’re going to burst? Is there a vessel big enough to contain your emotions? Are you drinking from a big enough cup? Find a beautiful designated drinking cup: a Viking horn, a golden chalice, a pewter cup, a wooden cup, a leaf, or your own cupped hands. Who will let you drink from their cup? Who extends you hospitality? Who will cook you a meal? Where can you get a hot meal? Who will help you clean up your mess without making you feel bad? The problem with feelings. Who even wants to feel these feelings?
Irritation and touchiness on every subject. Emotions run high, but where is the romance? Where is the sweetness? Everyone is jaded. Is romance dead? Is caring dead? Where are your friends who aren’t hanging around just because, Networking Opportunities? Who really cares about you? Are you surrounded by people who care about you? Are you surrounded by people who have your best interests at heart? Are your “friends” letting you get too drunk, too high, sleep around too much, fritter your time away, or abuse yourself? People who care about you, care about you. People who care about you, care about you, even if it’s difficult and uncomfortable.
Nobody wants to deal with personal feelings! Ghosting. Medication. Here, take two, and don’t ever call me for anything again, ever. Get OVER it. Geez Louise, get over it already! Don’t you know there’s a limit on how long you can feel something? You’re not supposed to keep feeling things! The statute of limitations has run out on your emotions.
Nostalgia. Sentimentality. Longing for the past. Longing for the good old days. I miss you. I don’t want to miss you, but I do. Cut off all emotion because it’s just too hard. Feeling your way through the tough stuff. Seriously though, don’t even think about expressing a difficult or negative feeling without immediately rolling it over into a positive spin. Negative and dark feelings are not allowed. You’re not even allowed to feel them out. There’s a reason there are no negative “responses and reactions” on social media – we don’t have them. None of us. Nobody feels bad. If you feel bad, then you are probably a bad person! Just keep taking your anti-depression meds for the depression you don’t have and that no one wants to talk about. Stop dragging everybody down. I’m sorry, but your feelings are not one of the five officially approved responses or reactions. Please limit your responses to the approved response patterns. Error! Error! You’re not supposed to react that way!!! That’s not how you’ve been programmed! Don’t trust the actual way you feel. Don’t trust your feelings. Don’t trust your gut reaction. The problem is YOU. If you’re not happy, the problem is you. Please begin the appropriate brainwashing program. You create your own reality right? Right? Right? Right? *Looks around to see if everyone still agrees*
How much are we expected to be in control of? Is reality completely within our control? Is there no chance at all that there are real reasons to be depressed or let down? Is it at all possible that some things are out of your control? Are we supposed to be awake 24/7? Should you hire a bodyguard? A security system? Should you install surveillance? A professional wish master to cast wishes for you all night and day? Should you hire a personal witch or shaman? Should you hire an emotional maintenance team? How much work do you put into maintaining a good mood? Yoga + vitamins + meds + daily affirmations + support groups + exercise + diet +++++ ???? Do you really have that much control over how reality manifests? What are the limits of manifestation? The paradox between manifesting reality and trusting that things will work out.
I ate all the stuff I was supposed to eat – the healthy stuff, the expensive stuff, the rare stuff, and then I saw that all my favorite foods were there at the bottom of the bowl, left uneaten, because now I am too full to eat them. Lost opportunities. People you miss. Things you miss. Times you miss. Where is your time best spent? Caring limits how much you’re willing to use people. Caring limits how much you’re willing to use up every last thing. What is the point of success if you don’t feel anything? The legacy of a time when people cared. Selling off sentiment, without actual sentiment. You could probably flip your great grandmother’s baby shoes and make $20! Selling nostalgia, but missing the actual personal emotion behind the items. What does it mean if there’s no personal attachment? Bygone times. Selling the past. Selling the feeling of a time that doesn’t exist anymore. The business of antiques and collectibles that hold sentimental value. How far can you get on sentiment? Pull those heart strings, and reap the profits! Baby businesses. Mothering businesses. Pampers = dollars. No babies = no Pampers = no dollars. We need baaabies! Babies for families or babies for business? We need hugs, not drugs.